Why your dates may be lying about being Republican

Republicans lie about being Republicans on dates. Bernie Sanders is a turn on.

How do you know if you’re dating a Republican? You could ask, some would advise you. But beware: Most Republicans are willing to take a trip into the GOP closet when it comes to matters of the heart.

A shocking 57 percent of Republicans are willing to lie about their political affiliation on dates, according to a new study from the dating website What’s Your Price, which ditches traditional matchmaking for hard economics. 

The website’s premise: You can lure somebody on a date by paying them.

Sounds kind of like a sex-worker app, no? Apparently, not. The company has a no-escorting policy, no sex is guaranteed on these dates in exchange for money, and it is 100 percent legally compliant, its spokesperson Hannahmae Dela Cruz tells The Colorado Independent. What’s Your Price helps men date the women of their dreams by putting a bid on them, and compensates women so, as Dela Cruz explains it, they don’t risk wasting time and money primping for and going on dud dates with losers.

Even if you can’t understand why some Republicans would lie to a potential love interest, maybe you can sympathize with the bind they’re in. If they support their party’s front-runner Donald Trump, they have a three-in-four chance of being turned down from going on a first date — and that’s even if they’re willing to pay for it.

Supporters of evangelical runner-up Ted Cruz only have a 38 percent chance of going on a paid date. 

On the other hand, if Republicans lie and pretend to like a certain schlumpy,  74-year-old democratic socialist from Vermont who rants about Wall Street, they have a 92 percent chance of going on a paid date. Apparently, supporting Bernie Sanders works like an aphrodisiac. 

The far-right’s hobgoblin “socialism” may in fact be a turn-on, Dela Cruz says. 

But it’s not just left-veering politics that woo singles. Backing establishment Democrat Hillary Clinton is a decent love-lure, too. Her supporters have an 84 percent chance of going on a paid date if they ask someone out.

As Dela Cruz tells it, being a Republican is often perceived as a turn off — even by fellow GOP members. Espousing conservative values is stigmatized, she says. The perception is that those who do are uptight, cheap and intolerant. 

For young people, we care a lot about gay rights and abortion rights and many of those things. It’s controversial for us to side with a party that doesn’t give rights to that population,” says Dela Cruz. Attaching yourself to that party when you’re on a date with somebody might jeopardize a love connection.”

Contrary to Dela Cruz’s social-conservatism-is-a-turn-off theory, Sen. Marco Rubio — whose opposition to abortion and LGBT equality is firm — is the best pick for out-of-the-closet Republicans wanting to score a date. Indeed, he’s the second highest date-inducing candidate (after the Bern). His supporters boast an 88 percent “yes” rate on paid date requests.

The survey shows that Democrats are much less likely to lie about their party affiliation than Republicans. Yet 13 percent still would.

Although we at The Colorado Independent find this all pretty fascinating, we take it with a grain of salt. That’s because we’re pretty sure people who don’t pay for dates have different attitudes toward politics. It’s possible that Trump lovers could find OKCupid, match.com, Tinder or Grindr more fruitful territory. Or maybe Sanders is a date-magnate across the board. 

If What’s Your Price’s is meaningful at all, GOP establishment favorite Rubio needs to win in the general election if Republican daters have a shot for love on that particular dating site. By the same token, as the data suggests, a long dry spell could await the GOP’s aspiring romantics if Trump takes the nomination.

Photo credit: in pastel, Creative Commons, Flickr


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